What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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