she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
