did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
