oh fat girl friday strikes again...
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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