it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
