i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Randomize
