honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
