I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
