I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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