We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
