new low.... made out with someone while peeing
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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