It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
