school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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