And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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