Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
