hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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