I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night�
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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