Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
Randomize
