Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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