I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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