The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
