i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Sober January is a disaster.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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