Too much gin, very little bucket
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
