4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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