If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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