dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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