Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
