Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
True but thats because hes a fetus.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Randomize
