My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Alive.
So much puke
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
