My nipple is on Facebook.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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