Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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