Do you still have your period?
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
He felt like a one man threesome
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
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