I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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