I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
You work out of a Hotel?
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
