He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
