It's Friday. Sex?
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
My penis needs a shock collar
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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