Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Randomize
