Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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