Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
