You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Houston, we have a blender
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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