"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
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