Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
