I CAN MOONWALK!
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
im on a boat
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