And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Randomize
