guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
