Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Randomize
