I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
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