Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize