Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize