did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
